We’re within the midst of the style week sprints (simply because the catwalk lights in New York dim, they flash on in London)—a time I normally love due to all of the contemporary wardrobe, make-up, and hair inspo I’m in a position to soak up. I normally welcome all of the haute developments, from bedazzled faces to cozy fleece clothes, with open arms. However this yr, I really feel personally attacked by one particular look—the low ponytail.
It began innocuously sufficient with Ariana Grande buying and selling in her signature excessive pony for an elastic secured on the nape of her neck. This, nonetheless, wasn’t an remoted incident—the coiffure then unfold like illness throughout purple carpets, road model pictures, and runways with out discrimination. J. Lo and Camilla Cabello each sported the take a look at the Grammys, and what felt like 1,000,000 designers (Ralph Lauren, Cushnie, Christian Siriano, Oscar de la Renta, the checklist goes on…) despatched fashions down the runway this season with low-riding ponies.
Being the development fiend that I’m, I’ve spent the higher a part of the final two weeks attempting to wrestle my hair into this look—and let me inform you, it isn’t going properly. Each single time I transfer my ponytail to the decrease quadrant of my scalp, I appear like Gaston from Magnificence and the Beast—the animated model.
Nearly each cause for this that I can dream up results in a sense of existential dread. Is it merely the feel and shoulder-grazing size of my hair that makes me appear like the burly antagonist (:pray palms:), or do Gaston and I’ve extra in widespread than I’d wish to assume? If a Disney animator sketched my portrait, would a picture of the broad-chested aggro-hetero seem on the paper? Sacrebleu!
Alas, these are questions I could by no means have the reply to—nor, actually do I need them; they appear like they may solely result in a really French model of ache and struggling. So as an alternative of fretting over why I appear like I’m going to bully a Disney princess, I’m going to keep away from the coiffure altogether—trend week, be damned—and persist with my excessive ponytails and scrunchies. (I dare say Meg would approve.)
Newsflash: That hair tie you’ve gotten in your wrist 24/7 might be extra dangerous than you assume, which is all of the extra cause to change to this RBG-favorite hair accent.